May 22, 2010

Chronicles of a weak week

Health is wealth. Accepted! (out of experience). But one can not deny that today, only when that wealth gets stolen, one gets to steal some pit stops from the race. Of course those sick leave days are not all that sick. Here is how I fell sick and spent a weak week recently.

Wonder why I was despised so badly by a few invisibles, I was officially food-poisoned a fortnight back. The invisibles were truly invincible too. As a matter of fact, the above sentence is an upto-my-best attempt at describing energy loss from the body due to gastric problems such as nausea and amoebiasis to the least embarrassing extent. So, long story short, I was poisoned and had to seek refuge at the locally available panacea- mother's care and home food- to recover and write this chronicle. Lets move ahead to the brighter side of the dull ill days.

1. No work: I can't exactly say I was jobless- may be we can say I was workless at my job then. (For further details on this condition, please consult any nearest available software benchwarmer). So with a single e-mail and a bearded and tired status-proof visit to my employer, I was off-work for a week.

2. Home sweet home: Bachelors like me (eligible of course... but that is out of context here) will be accustomed to the "Elaichu poitiye da"s that greet them first up on a home visit. (Means 'You have lost weight'). My visit had an additional sentence too this time, "Nalla velai... Polachu vandiye da". (Means 'Thank goodness, you made it alive till here'). This gives a rough picture about how I reached home. This recovery trip meant a cut to most of the usual home-perks. No feasts, no sweets, no milk too. But when served with proper care, even dissolved idlis (without any chutney) and rice kanjis can taste like the elixir too. That was discovery #1 in this week.

3. Cousin company: Co-incidentally, my enemies chose a summer vacation to poison me. So I was thankfully blessed with the company of cousins and the vacation-visiting sister at home. The television proved to be dull, sickening, nauseating, heart-breaking and tear-jerking (due to the serials for my mother; due to the remote possession statistics for me) as usual. Henceforth, the fifth standard passed cousin assumes a very greater significance in making my stay enjoyable for me. Kids are kids all the time and this kid is an especially bright one. I still remember when I taught him social sciences for his V std annual exam. Reading about the climatic descriptions of the tropical desert regions (Hot and dry; very humid; scanty rainfall etc. ), he argued with me for long why our areas are not classified under this section. At the end of the argument, I had to concede defeat actually. No kidding with the kids , see.....Discovery #2 !

4. IV myth: Three years ago, when somebody authorised an IV for me, I would have been rejoicing. Well, that was college and that was expanded as Industrial Visit. Intra-venous glucose administration is not a funny prescription though. I tried not to capitulate to this IVfication, for I did not want to feel like a patient ending up flat on a hospital bed with a bottle counting 1..2...3... over my head. Strangely, no patient wants to feel like a patient. And all doctors know that. And all parents support that. No escapade.. therefore. One day, two people in the room, three bottles of glucose, four walls to surround, seven hours (I don't get anything for five and six.. sorry :-) ). Discovery #3- All IVs are not fun!

5. Glucose and its different forms: Lying on bed with the mobile phone's company, I actually found out there are too many supplementary forms of glucose available. Texting your pals is the first of them. Having people who respond to your texts when you need them the most is the second. Having such people in plural is the third revelation. Having a friendly father to discuss politics and Bangalore food when you are tired of texting with one hand (with the right wrist supporting the butterfly shaped needle, left-hand texting can consume some energy reserves for simpletons like me) was the ultimate soothing rediscovery. With the glucose and all these supplements, I seemed to get more than the prescribed dose of energy that day. Discovery #4- This IV is not all that bad either.

6. The first touch to older times: Even after glucosification, the gastric infection does its best to keep you away from tasting food, courtesy: appetite loss and a recurrence fear. So the first meal you take in the full course marks a significant feat to normalcy once again. Up and running I may go anywhere, that first normal meal's taste will linger forever. Discovery #5!

7. Ultimate discovery: This can not be actually termed a discovery because the process is ongoing and conclusive evidences are yet to be found. But a week's sickness-assisted solidarity and surroundings provides cope to a lot of introspection. Self-discovery will get a good boost during such times- this is a scientifically proven fact testified by many wise people- of solidarity and adds considerable inputs to your ongoing discovery process. Hence, Self is the actual Discovery#5.5!

PS- 1. From the fact that I am writing this, you can be assured that I am alright now. So enquiries and condolences on that front can be avoided, please.
2. I requested my father to take a picture of me with the IV tubes in the hospital for this blogpost. That was the only occasion when he gave me a cold glare. So no pictures, kindly adjust:-)